As May and June arrive in the UK, so does exam season. For young people sitting GCSEs or A-Levels, this can feel like one of the most pressured times in their lives. And for parents and carers watching on, it can be hard to know how to help.
Behind every revision timetable, practice paper and past paper mark, there’s a human being—often a young person feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or even a bit lost.
As a counsellor working with both young people and adults, I often hear how exam season heightens feelings of stress, low self-esteem, and emotional exhaustion. But I also see how, with the right support, young people can build resilience and begin to feel more in control of their experience.
The Weight of Expectation
GCSEs and A-Levels can feel like more than just assessments. For some, they feel like a judgment on their intelligence, identity, or future. A few ‘bad’ grades can trigger spirals of negative thinking: “I’m failing”, “I’m not good enough”, or “I’ll let everyone down.”
These thoughts don’t just come from the exam papers themselves—they’re shaped by school targets, peer comparisons, family hopes, and internal pressure.
When self-esteem is already fragile, exam stress can deepen the sense of not being enough.
For Parents: A Moment to Reflect
It can help to take a moment to remember your own experiences. Maybe it was your O-Levels, GCSEs, A-Levels, a driving test, a job interview, or a university presentation. Can you recall the nerves, the dread, and the racing thoughts?
By reconnecting with that feeling—not to compare, but to empathise—you might find a new way to understand what your child is going through. Exam pressure isn’t new, but how it’s experienced today (with social media, school accountability, and constant connectivity) can make it feel all-consuming.
The Ripple Effect on Families
The stress of exams doesn’t stop at the school gates. It often follows young people home, affecting the whole family system. You might notice more tension in the house, arguments over revision, or your child becoming withdrawn or emotionally reactive.
You might also feel helpless—unsure whether to step in or give space. It’s natural to want to protect your child from distress, but sometimes just being present, calm, and accepting is more powerful than any practical advice.
Helping Young People Feel More in Control
One of the most important things we can do is help young people feel that they still have some choice, some say, some influence—because anxiety often thrives where there’s a sense of helplessness.
Try gently exploring questions like:
- What’s one thing that would make revision feel a little more manageable today?
- When do you feel most focused or calm? Can we build more of that in?
- Is there something you’d like to do differently with your study time or routine?
Even small decisions—like choosing when to take a break, or what topic to revise first—can help restore a feeling of empowerment.
Signs Your Child Might Be Struggling
Every young person copes differently, but signs of exam stress may include:
- Changes in sleep or appetite
- Avoidance of schoolwork or school altogether
- Emotional outbursts or frequent tears
- Negative self-talk or perfectionism
- Physical symptoms like headaches or stomach aches
If these signs persist or begin to impact daily life, it might be time to explore further support.
Coping Strategies That Can Help
Here are a few gentle, supportive ways to ease the pressure of exam season:
Normalise nerves – It’s okay to feel anxious. It doesn’t mean you’re not capable.
Break it down – Small revision goals are more manageable than giant tasks.
Rest is productive – Sleep, food, daylight, and breaks all help the brain absorb and recall information.
Let feelings out – Whether through talking, writing, art or movement, expression makes a difference.
Remember self-worth – Your child is so much more than a grade or result.
Exam season is challenging—not just for young people, but for families too. The pressure can bring up big emotions, old doubts, and real exhaustion. Whether you're a parent trying to offer support, or a young person navigating the stress of GCSEs or A-Levels, please know you're not alone—and you're not doing it wrong.
Support is out there. For some, talking things through with a trusted adult, teacher, or trained professional can make a real difference. Even small changes—like adjusting routines, talking about worries, or simply being kind to yourself—can ease the load.
To every young person preparing for exams: remember, you are amazing, you are good enough, and you are so much more than your grades.
You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”
– A.A. Milne (Winnie the Pooh)